The whole New Zealand thing is definately already opening my eyes and we've still got 4.5 weeks.
I actually had someone come out and say they'd be afraid to do it. I've had older people try to talk me out of it, older say go for it, say they're jealous, young say their jealous, and recently I've noticed a couple my age say 'they couldn't do it' and finally one gal came out and admitted she'd be too afraid.
Fear is a funny thing. It's seldom truly rational or we'd never get in cars.
People throw around adrenaline junky, but I think too calously. Most people I know that participate in 'risky' behaviors take tons of steps to reduce risks. Meanwhile we all drive our cars distracted or tired. Climbers spend hours practicing knots and anchor placements that minimize risks, scuba divers triple check their systems, sky divers will patiently arange their chutes.
I think a lot of people that participate either due so to conquer fear, or really just love the activity for the experience. I'm somewhere in between myself. I find I don't like fear or an adrenaline boost. I definately like conquering my fear mostly before I even take a step outdoors.
But that last little bit remains....
I feel like as scramble solo, as take that first hand-hold up the mountain, that first step off the cliff as you rappel, as I eye-ball each speed check going into a snowboard jump, or as I enter the point of no escape on a snowboarding line I've never taken.
To me it's about eliminating the foolish risk, taking all the precautions, thinking out every possible outcome, weighing the good and the bad... and then you've got to jump.
One can't stand on the edge forever. Backing away is embarassing, not even if no-one knows. It's the internal pride.
I wouldn't say I leap for just anything, until yI know how hard I can fall. But I try not to exaggerate the fall in my mind. As we tend to mature and gain experience we take less risk.
Hell we've already outlived our foolish years. Now we can make informed decisions, but too many of us confuse the being informed with being trapped.
Thank goodness my wife is brave enough to do this and encourage me to jump with her. I've always known we were like minded, but I'm realizing how much I can learn as we each push each other.
It's good to be afraid, it means your alive and your aware of risks. But I won't let fear define a life of boredom for me. I'm not afraid of sitting still, one day, but for now I won't be afraid of enjoying the adventure.
If New Zealand means 1 less nice car in my life or one less bedroom on my house... good.
